JustAGuyinHK

I woke up and took a pill. It was a Vyvanse for ADHD.

I was diagnosed with it over 46 years ago but hadn't tried medication until 10 years ago. I take Vyvanse when I know I won't be engaging with many people but still need it to focus on getting things done. It helps me focus on whatever my brain is focused on – either on task or not. I tend not to overthink and be an over-perfectionist on the tasks I am working on. It helps, but only when I am not with other people.

Being social on Vyvanse, Concerta, or Ritalin is not good. For me, it is different; it removes the filter and eliminates any emotion from being with people. The pill turns me into a pure, logical person. I get tasks done but I am not good around people. I am a primary school teacher, and making meaningful connections is essential. It is also vital for me as a person. Connecting with others is what I crave most and why I don't take it often.

I rarely use medication to manage my ADHD. The last time was when I went to the library for 8 hours to study in August. For me, the social costs of the medication outweigh the benefits of being productive. I need to be around people. Vyvanse makes me feel like I am not a good person to be around.

So lets give this a try and see where this leads.